Accepting women as equal human beings with the same rights, responsibilities, and desires and being in a loving, mature relationship should not be treated as mutually exclusive entities.Perhaps men’s fear of the growing ubiquity of feminism in popular culture and among younger women isn’t completely unjustified.
Undermining men’s traditional role as “family breadwinner” and making them feel unappreciated is the goal of feminist ideology, but maybe it’s become an unintended effect.
Though fewer women are dependent on men to provide economic security and physical protection, feminism does not eliminate the basic human desire to love and to be loved in return.
I have publicly self-identified as a feminist for about five years now.
Even before my official declaration, dating was difficult — to say the least.
They didn’t get that these beliefs form the basis of both my professional and my personal life, and are not matters on which I am ready to compromise.
Turns out, I’m not alone in thinking that feminist men are hard to find.My strong connection to feminist ideas are at the very core of who I am and yet I found myself minimizing the importance of feminism to me in order to appease the men I was dating.I did not want to scare them away by demonstrating my unwavering dedication to women’s rights and justice — so instead, for a time, I dismissed their meaning in my life.Admittedly, I voiced my passion for these issues quite vocally but, for me, this was the same as discussing my favorite band or sports team: a piece of myself I wanted my partner to understand.I would discuss at length the importance of copay-free birth control access and programs to promote gender equity, but my dates never could comprehend why these were more than just ideological beliefs for me.I never purposefully attempted to emasculate prospective partners but, for some reason unknown to me, my opinions on legal abortion, access to reproductive health care, and women’s rights in general seemed to scare away even the most promising suitors.