As I’m fond of saying, dating success is 80% attitude and 20% skill, and a of that attitude involves both issues of masculinity and also understanding and empathizing with women.
The people who do best with women are the ones who not only understand them but, critically, don’t view them as opponents, enemies or inferiors.
My brother, who also had a long time crush on a female friend that was not reciprocated, “took the red pill” two years ago.
Some their “dating” advice is basically descriptions of abusive relationships.
They claim to not hate women and focus on self improvement, but believe men must establish control/dominance over the women in their lives in order to “get sex”, and that women are intellectually/morally inferior to men.
He believed that all women are the same, that women are only good for sex and babies, that all women are too emotional/unreliable to vote, lead, or work.
He regularly insulted and talked down to his female friends, and touched them in ways that make them uncomfortable.
Much of what we assume to be the accepted wisdom regarding relationships is based around intellectual fallacies and cultural assumptions with no actual fact behind them.
In fact, many of these cultural biases end up coloring the study of relationships and human sexuality, letting confirmation bias and naturalistic fallacies distort scientific inquiry.
They feel that women have somehow gained an unfair advantage in the world, making it virtually impossible for a heterosexual, cisgendered white man to get a break.
They see relationships as a fight for dominance and sex as a god-given right that’s being kept from them by women because REASONS.
but so much of pick-up is based around mistaken ideas regarding gender roles and female sexuality that it’s difficult to sort the gold from the toxic, rape-y dross.
Of course, there are a lot of people who don’t feel this way.
However, he became a massive asshole in the process.