I have pondered long and hard two questions: Why do people repeatedly does not fully identify the seriousness of the problem. The horrible fact is they are “by nature children of wrath” (Ephesians 2:3). training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age” (Titus –12).
If we are going to get serious about the problem in the church we can ill afford to be misled in our thinking. The least bit of lust is an indication of vast corruption in the human heart. I believe addictionology plays down the seriousness of sin and the necessity of the work of God when it encourages the sexual addict to accept the theory that recovery will only be successful when they begin to believe that they are a good person at the core and just have a disease. By nature and by choice we satisfy ourselves, rebel against God, and have no accurate understanding of the depth of our problem. Look closely and you will see that the sexual sinner is disappointed with pleasure in their pursuit of what is essentially false intimacy.
It is also a calculated contradiction of one’s public image that if revealed would bring ruin.
Such rationalization is universal to all secret sexual sin.
“After all, a lot of people would be hurt if they knew what I was doing.” As one pastor put it, “I was in a six month affair, at the same time preaching and counseling against adultery, and telling myself that God didn’t care because the church was growing.” In reality, it is not the behavior alone that is hidden.
Physical adultery includes an affair, multiple affairs, prostitution, and homosexuality. it is shameful even to speak of the things that they do in secret” (Ephesians –12).
Other sexual behaviors within the ministry are such heinous “unfruitful works of darkness . To face the crisis we must correctly understand the nature of the problem, ask God to search our own hearts, and be committed to restore each one caught in sexual sin “in a spirit of gentleness” (Galatians 6:1). Like David, the sexual sinner has sinned “against the Lord” (2 Samuel ), and in so doing has “utterly scorned the Lord” (verse 14).
Face the facts: the motive for secrecy is to keep doing it.
But secrecy of sexual sin also indicates a person’s commitment to flee from the light.A part of exchanging the “truth about God for a lie” (Romans ) is that you end up with pleasure now, Deception runs deeper than we think.Deception is inherent to the problem of sexual sin on two levels.First, there is the double life with clandestine liaisons, endless hidden hours on a computer, or the misuse of unaccounted time away from the office or home.The behavior is carefully hidden from view, but there are lies, then more lies to cover the lies.When one is held in the grip of sexual sin, there is no hope of self-reform or self-efforts, for those living according to the “passions of their flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and mind” (Ephesians 2:3). Yet the sexual sinner, finding no pleasure in real intimacy with God, ultimately finds no pleasure in false intimacy.